Morning Folks.
Another day is upon us, and it looks as tho it is gonna be a busy day.
For once listing items is not the main feature of the day, That honour goes to Tidying up n sorting the Computer room.
Altho I am still as hampered with my back and very unsteadiness, when I stand up.
Means again everything is done as careful as I can, and as slow as possible.
I have been mixing the jobs around all day, so as to try n work around the above issues.
Today finds me a bit on the flat side of things, my mind, which for the last week has been steady as a rock in focus of what I am doing, has disappeared and I am struggling to remain focused on anything.
Often today I have come around and would just be sat here, doing nothing and not a clue as to what I was doing !
The news only got worse as Lynne came in and showed me a post from Bab's Reeve that Her husband and a good friend to us has passed on!
It floored me, and I sat here with tears running down my cheeks, as I tried to remember the times we had and the friendship.....
I was not very successful in that, but I just said to Lynne we need to get Vincent done now, as Chris's day is one I do not want to miss, and Lynne I think feels the same way.
R.I.P - my friend, party and ride hard and we will all join you again.....
By about 7pm, I had had enough, I did not want to sit here, do anything so I went to bed for an early nights sleep, as I am hoping we will be focused on the Transit for a large chunk of Tomorrow.
I phoned up Kingsway Tyres this afternoon and spoke to them about replacing both wing mirrors glasses for me ( we have them, but I do not have the strength to fit them. Usual yearly engine service, that it has not had done since 2018! (but then done less than 2000 miles up to today) and finally get it booked in were they take the transit as they cannot do class 7 MOT's.
Doug asked me to ring back on Monday Morning and they may be able to do it all then. So fingers crossed on the MOT front and I am hoping it passes with flying colours, then we can really get started on the conversion....
There are a few jobs, that I know need doing and I cannot put them off much longer, as the costs of repairs will just get higher, the longer we leave them.
I have had a read of some of the "Life n Crimes" updates over the last 6 months, (not every day) and I have been amazed at how they have changed!
From the more negative side of things, to the more positive side of things and the choices Lynne n me have been making recently has changed the whole outlook, altho we have been here before!
So I am trying to not be too over confident, or the comments of some people who say "your better now" you do not need to do the Life n Grimes anymore !
WRONG ! - the Life n Grimes has become a major part of my life and over time has allowed me to vent, let off steam, rant n rave, and has been the catalyst of the changes that have finally been happening over the last 2 weeks!.
Yes 2 weeks, is hardly cured, The fight with the black dog still goes on daily, it has just been put into the background as other more positive to me things have taken over.
I suspect if I was to end up going back to just sleeping all the time and stop doing the little I am doing that It would rear it's ugly head again and sweep me back were I was.
That's the thing I have found out with speaking to other people who fight the black dog, things may look as if they are better and sometimes people believe the front that when we are in control of the face we put on to the world that there is nothing wrong. These are the times we need friends, family the most as they are probably the most dangerous of times, if things start to slip backwards.
Too me my "Life n Grimes" is all about the moment I sit here and let my fingers do the talking for me as They see them at that moment in time!.
But for me the best moments are when I get a message, a call, or someone calls round and says thank you your daily rants have helped me....
Some days I just cannot write much, other days my fingers do not stop, but it is all the same for me, at the moment what is typed in is what I believe at the time, rightly or wrongly, and sometimes it has hurt me, family and others. But that is how I cope as best as I can.
As someone once said " you always hurt those you love and depend on the most" !
i do not know why that is or how it happens, but for me it has proven very true.
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